What I've learned in the last 2 years

As the two year anniversary of the accident approaches I wanted to take time to reflect not on what I've lost, but what I have learned because of the loss.
I've learned:
1. to walk again- I tend to forget that when I get frustrated with my lack of motivation and slow running times, that it has not been that long since I had to use a walker and needed help just to sit up.
2.I have some amazing friends-you have been so supportive and tolerant of my moodiness and have been willing to make major sacrifices of your time to spend it with me
3. What an impact a person's life when centered on Christ can make- testimony of what people have learned and still remember from Mike is overwhelming it should be motivation to live the way that he did-for Christ
4. That God is sovereign over the big things and little things in my life- trusting Him is hard, but when I do things go a lot better
5. I have the opportunity to do things better- Most days I wish that God would have taken me too, but since that was not His plan I have the opportunity to be a better friend, sister, aunt, teacher, perhaps a wife (I'm still not sure that will happen again, but if it does I know more than I ever did and would change a lot, but Mike is a tough act to follow) I can only pray that I take the opportunity and time to invest in the relationships God has given me.
6. God's grace is an amazing power force that supplies peace, strength, comfort, and reason to get up each day despite how I feel. Without it I would not be able to function.
7. To find joy in Christ. Mike would always ask me when I was upset or moodymoods as he called it where is your joy, the expected response was "in Christ" but in the last 24 months there has been joy but only if I look to Christ and not the circumstance He has blessed me in so many ways that I have to thank Him daily for all He provides and the places He guides, even though I may not want to go willingly.
8. I am an emotional roller coaster, but that is alright. I never would have thought that you could be totally happy and completely sad in the same moment, but the O'Roark wedding is proof that this is possible. You can be excited and devastated in the same moment and I can be completely lonely in a crowded room or feel content while alone. It doesn't make sense and I have no words to describe it but despite popular belief Amy is an emotional person even if i don't like to show it.
9. God has an amazing love for me. Yes Jesus loves me is a song we all know, but I don't think until you are in the darkest pit of despair do you realize that He really loves you. Oh the deep deep love of Jesus vast unmeasured rolling as the mighty ocean in its fullness over me.....all I need and trust is the deep deep love of Jesus.....he's interceding before the throne...far surpassing all the rest its an ocean full of blessing in the midst of every test...you will bring us home to glory where your love will never end.
10. Psalms and hymns are comforting and full of doctrine that when I refuse to open the Bible because it hurts, minister to me and push me to open up God's word, because that truly is the only place that will bring me healing. And although I still have a long way to go in the healing process, God is working and as much as I want to be done with the grieving process God is using it to teach and grow me into a better person than I ever was before the accident, so for that I thank Him for it.

God is good no matter how I feel. He is faithful when I am not. He loves me and that should be enough. I pray that you will experience God's love daily and not wait for catastrophe to happen before you realize the depth of that love. He gives and takes away Blessed be His name!