my crazy life

I have not posted anything in awhile due to the crazyness of my life. So I will go back a couple weekends. My sister texted me Tuesday Jan. 13 asking if I would go skiing with them on thurs the 15th, with wedding details to help with for a fabulous wedding on the 24th i said no at first but was later persuaded to go. So I spent Wed the 14 running around trying to get all the supplies for the wedding projects. I spent a fair amount of time sitting on the floor of Joanne's craft store counting paper and trying to figure last creative ways to pull off Leilanis ideas and make them a reality. So droping the supplies for her programs off I got home around 11 and packed. worked thursday then drove up to mammoth with a 3 month old, a 3year old, my sister and her husband. I give parents credit. making bottles in a moving car and changing diapers and keeping a 3 yr old entertained is a task. I had so much fun. I took a ski lesson on Fri. I didn't fall once and thought I was doing pretty darn good and perhaps you would see me in the next winter olympics in the downhill, however Saturday I went with Shelly and his brother and fam to a much different hill. the first run I was flying so I made myself fall, Shelly gave me some great advice and the next few runs were great. Then the final run, I managed to get a concusion and whiplash but looked Hollywood worthy in my graceless fall down the mountian. But I would do it agian in a heart beat!!Sunday I felt horrible so I was not going to ski, and spent time building snowmen, snowpigs, and other wildlife withAVA so much fun... but my brother convinced me to face the mountian agian so I did for the last hour of the day and didn't hurt myself thankfully. I watched Ava in her ski school on Monday morning the cutest thing then we slowly left the mountian when I post pictures I give more detail as to the fun of traveling with small kids!! so I got home late Monday the 19 with all the wedding projects left to do. Tues. I bought the wood for the frames and had help cutting them from an pretty tallented brother in law after ballet practice. Thankyou Ed. I got home and stained all the frames and began the process of covering the foam and figuring out how I was going to put it all together. In a panic on Wed. I called in emergency backup...Ms Baldwin and later Mr. Gardiner b/c I don't have a nail gun. But all the projects came together wonderfully and we drove to Santa Maria on Thurs. night. The wedding weekend was fun and full of laughter and I was so glad that I had the chance to meet some of Leilani's family and Chris' too. They all are great people. The big day was beautiful and for the most part was free of any major disaters. and most importantly Mike's best friend and the laughing lady who saved me the first summer after the accident are married! I was then blessed to spend what could of been a very lonely night with the Baldwins at the movies. What a sight. Elisabeth and I still had wedding hair and what was left of our makeup on wearing jeans sitting in the crowd of what seemed like pretty normal people. I could not help in my sleep deprived state to crack up! You had to be there. Sunday I got up loaded the gifts, found the cake and began my long drive back to my empty house. I stopped at Chris' parents house for a quick visit and a yummy bowl of coco krispies!!! and then into ventura I went. I was n't going to stop but decided that the day would be far to long to spend by myself so I met my brother and hung out with his family. I finally after a detor in ventura made it home around 8 unloaded the gifts at Ruthies and finally made into my house around 9. totally exhausted and emotionally drained I cried for a good long while and with the help of Astrid's prayers fell asleep around midnight.

The last two weekends have been full of emotion and little sleep and therefor I tend to be on the teary side. I struggle to be content in the role of aunt and not mother of my own, the role of the single friend with only vivid memories of how great marriage is but the reality that it is not forever promised to us. But with all my mixed emotions of gladly serving in both roles God shows His grace. I was never so close to Joy as after the accident, and never so close to Chris or Leilani until that summer. God brings blessings out of the darkness- I love that Shelly considers me part of his family, and I am so blessed to have amazing friends like the O'Roarks! God is faithful and He will provide for me and comfort me and He will heal me eventually. Thanks for all of your prayers over the last couple of weeks, they have been challenging, but I am continuing to be stretched and hopefully I am growing to be more like Christ.